Saturday, 3 September 2016

Surrounded By Elephants

WALT - Use descriptive language features

We came face to face with the largest land animal on the planet, the African elephant. We described the events in the video as we experienced them. We were challenged to use at least 3 language features such as similes, metaphors, hyperbole, personification and alliteration.

Surrounded by Elephants by Ella

The severe sun was burning the back of my neck as I wandered around looking for wildlife. “Thump thump” I froze “Could it be…..” I turned around slowly and gasped, a herd of colossal mammals approached me curiously as I stood speechless. The elephant peered at me waving its wrinkled trunk around in my face as I stood there silently.

The herd of beasts looked just like its ancient ancestor, the mammoth. They walked towards me but they didn’t seem to be bothered as they started to rip out chunks of grass and devour it all. Their skin was hard and wrinkled like a leather case. Their menacing ivory tusks looked like a skewer stuck out from their face, I was petrified. While trumpeting with their trunks their ears flapped and waved like a kite wanting to fly free. The sky was a clear sapphire while the long emerald grass danced along in the wind. It looked like a beautiful paradise waiting to be explored and discovered.

1 comment:

  1. Wow Ella! Room 9 thinks you did a great job describing your moment in time. Layibah loved your used of alliteration in the phrase 'the severe sun'. She liked it because severe was an interesting and high level adjective. Lachlan liked how you used it as a hook to start your writing.
    Naomi, Alessandra and Aamnah loved your similes but thought maybe next time you could use a few more metaphors instead so there a few examples of each.
    Thanks for sharing :)